People and their babies
it seems that i'm one of a dwindling few contemporaries who is babyless. i am also dogless. we, however, are not fishless.
kids are wholly life-altering and spontaniety-altering but also life affirming, or so i've heard. they're also money-parting and sleep-depriving bastards till they reach a certain age.
i'd like to take part in this baby-making, baby having and raising of young people tradition that is ingrained in our culture, but not quite yet. therefore, before this happens, i (and husband) must take part in certain things that we may not be able to take part in. namely, things that we cannot do with the monkey people. what things, i don't know, to be honest.
i admire the parents who tote their tots to other countries, and i admire the adults who one night, decide to do it - a quick but not entirely unmeditated-upon decision - and produce a baby 9 months later. children are a practically inevitable byproduct of married straight people, anyway, right?
but i must admit that i relish the communal drinking and the late nights (and the late mornings) and because i have not yet procreated, i am not constantly creeped out by the fact that in x-18 years i will have to pay for college, or in x-4 years i will have to shell out for expensive private school. (or, obviously those figures are creeping me out already.)
the turn on: i find myself desiring a small person of my own only when i am around parents who have fun and enjoy life while maintaining good parenting techniques. they have the supercool kids and enjoy the parenting bit but get to live it up and say bad words and go out sometimes too.
the turnoff: what turns me off is the parents who become babified in the most disgusting way. they live boring-ass lives and live in the burbs and only talk about strollers and shit like that. they serve as child-pleasing robots and disregard their own potentials. will i turn into one of those people anyway?
kids are wholly life-altering and spontaniety-altering but also life affirming, or so i've heard. they're also money-parting and sleep-depriving bastards till they reach a certain age.
i'd like to take part in this baby-making, baby having and raising of young people tradition that is ingrained in our culture, but not quite yet. therefore, before this happens, i (and husband) must take part in certain things that we may not be able to take part in. namely, things that we cannot do with the monkey people. what things, i don't know, to be honest.
i admire the parents who tote their tots to other countries, and i admire the adults who one night, decide to do it - a quick but not entirely unmeditated-upon decision - and produce a baby 9 months later. children are a practically inevitable byproduct of married straight people, anyway, right?
but i must admit that i relish the communal drinking and the late nights (and the late mornings) and because i have not yet procreated, i am not constantly creeped out by the fact that in x-18 years i will have to pay for college, or in x-4 years i will have to shell out for expensive private school. (or, obviously those figures are creeping me out already.)
the turn on: i find myself desiring a small person of my own only when i am around parents who have fun and enjoy life while maintaining good parenting techniques. they have the supercool kids and enjoy the parenting bit but get to live it up and say bad words and go out sometimes too.
the turnoff: what turns me off is the parents who become babified in the most disgusting way. they live boring-ass lives and live in the burbs and only talk about strollers and shit like that. they serve as child-pleasing robots and disregard their own potentials. will i turn into one of those people anyway?
posted by Liz Foreman at
2:10 PM
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